![](\"http:\/\/har0ld.free.fr\/myblog\/StandingCat.jpg\")
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"In the past week I\u2019ve had a few calls with my French friends. I hadn\u2019t seen or heard them in six years.<\/p>\n
I\u2019m trying to analyze. How casual and absolutely overwhelming that is. I call, the camera shows that I\u2019m in some decent light, I wait for them. They show up, exactly as I remember them. Same voice. Same living room. Same body language. Same shit going on there. Exciting and disappointing altogether.<\/p>\n
It\u2019s not soothing. It feels harsh, like walking through a parking lot in a heat wave. For 45 minutes I have this window into which we dive in, where time doesn\u2019t exist, and then we close it. And now emptiness takes over.<\/p>\n
I don\u2019t think the human psyche was prepared for that kind of thing. You\u2019re not supposed to see someone you know by heart on video chat, after a long hiatus before closing the window like it\u2019s just another window. Of course it feels like something wrong happened. Was that real? Do we really know each other? Am I fucking dreaming?<\/p>\n
This morning it went from life on Crenshaw to finishing some music to video call with coworkers to news about Crenshaw to texting my dude who\u2019s sending me his latest music (but rarely answers when I ask him how he\u2019s doing, yeah I\u2019m snitching bruh idc) to video call with my cousin who lives in \u201cour\u201d little village in France. She\u2019s telling me about my foster family there and how where she works, a nursing home, they recently lost more than half of their patients. Nothing special, right?<\/p>\n
I hang up, take all the news in. The human cost. What are families? Communities? The never-ending intricacies of *it all*. And now I\u2019m exhausted. It\u2019s a lot of emotions.<\/p>\n
Let\u2019s just say that I looked and sounded like that cat today.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
In the past week I\u2019ve had a few calls with my French friends. I hadn\u2019t seen or heard them in six years. I\u2019m trying to analyze. How casual and absolutely overwhelming that is. I call, the camera shows that I\u2019m in some decent light, I wait for them. They show up, exactly as I remember […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3041"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3041"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3041\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3042,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3041\/revisions\/3042"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3041"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3041"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3041"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}