{"id":3094,"date":"2020-06-19T03:51:34","date_gmt":"2020-06-19T03:51:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/?p=3094"},"modified":"2020-06-19T03:51:34","modified_gmt":"2020-06-19T03:51:34","slug":"so-i-helped-of-course","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/2020\/06\/so-i-helped-of-course\/","title":{"rendered":"So I helped of course"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/p>\n

First of all a wasp nest is some dry dirt against a wall. What is there for me to help with? Girl just knock it down with a broom.<\/p>\n

I show up, amused. She asks: \u201cDo you know how to knock down a wasp nest?\u201d<\/em> Notice how it went from \u201ccan you help me\u201d <\/em>to \u201cwhen are you going to do what you\u2019re supposed to do, you\u2019re a Man etc?\u201d. <\/em>The classic I\u2019m-a-woman-I\u2019m-weak switcheroo. Fine.<\/p>\n

I look at the single lane tunnel against the wall. It\u2019s a baby nest. It\u2019s not even a nest yet. Its being built for sure.<\/p>\n

So I go grab what I need and show up at the front door to do the job and she\u2019s like \u201ccan I help?\u201d<\/em> in her t-shirt, lying like a mofo. I laugh her out with my hoodie on and my broom in the other hand. \u201cI\u2019m fine\u201d<\/em> I say, smiling.<\/p>\n

I\u2019m about to knock it down and of course the single wasp arrives to build the rest. I wait for it to be inside the single lane tunnel before smacking the whole thing with the broom. I successfully achieve this.<\/p>\n

But I know it\u2019s not over with the wasp. It never is. I jump down the stairs to get rid of the corpse but this bitch is just lightheaded. As I try to get rid of it on the front yard, the flying beast starts flying again and comes at me.<\/p>\n

No, not today beloved creature of the earth. Not these days. I whack it so hard I send it to the Precambrian. I whooped that insect\u2019s ass on the lawn. I might even have muttered \u201cfuck 12\u201d<\/em>. I didn\u2019t even look back. I knew it was over.<\/p>\n

I protected where I live, I didn\u2019t claim no patriarchy, I helped a black woman for free. The bar is low. I\u2019m the best.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

First of all a wasp nest is some dry dirt against a wall. What is there for me to help with? Girl just knock it down with a broom. I show up, amused. She asks: \u201cDo you know how to knock down a wasp nest?\u201d Notice how it went from \u201ccan you help me\u201d to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3094"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3094"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3094\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3095,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3094\/revisions\/3095"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3094"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3094"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/har0ld.com\/playground\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3094"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}