It’s going to be a theme this year I guess, I’m going to look back a bit. Ten years that I’ve been living in the same place -a bit less the past few years- and ten years that I’ve been blogging. Next year right but I was already blogging in 2003 on my friend’s site so you shut up.
It’s like all of sudden I realized that I had archives! I have never really spent any time reading back. But hey, let’s look at March 2006, seven years ago. BAM, mind blown: I was already crazy about games and developers, watching documentaries, taking care of my grandparents, complaining about France’s stupid ass work laws, scrapping the surface of the black planet and its struggle, high fiving feminists… And sex. Which I don’t write about anymore though it is kind of central in my life these past few years.
But for the rest, same. Consistent as fuck. Seven years later I can say that gamedev has lost some magic, the world is fucked as dozens of documentaries showed me since then, the grandparents are still a concern but it really feels like it’s not going to be for long…
Also it’s the little things but stuff that I was dreaming of having well, I have them. My fanless computer and Fender Stratocaster are standing there on my left. It’s really enjoyable to read back on your fantasy and dreams, and realize that some happened. All right, that’s like really small ass dreams but I didn’t dream of living in LA, experimenting some epic moments there and yet it totally happened so suck on thisss. It’s the thing to me these days, I realize I’m part of this extremely small number of totally free black men in the world, I’m part of the 0.0001%.
So I’m really asking myself where to go from there, besides nowhere. Pondering. I need to stop watering down my intensity. I need to fuel it into something that grows. More work is always a good answer, amirite.