I remember the headline in February and I remember telling myself “I don’t have time for this right now”. I’m sorry, Ahmaud Arbery. it’s been truly crazy. The way your life ended abruptly has been, too.

The video leaked yesterday and popped up in my feed, I didn’t have the time to read the description. The murder was already happening. Right under it, the story of a black woman doing more™.

I can’t think. I just want to hold my Black beloved ones against my chest and breathe them forever. You can never leave me. I gauge at how high I can charge up my anger. Too high. That’s self-destruction high and I can’t afford that. I’m building. I’m securing. I’m maintaining. I’m having flashbacks. They always happen. The previous dead black bodies that were not supposed to go cold anytime soon.

Rest is all there is.

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