Me Myself&I Music

Amber Mark

Making love to my ears right now.

(I still think a 10-track album is better than a 15+ ones, but whatever)


Too many games

Too many games is a good Maze’s song but it’s also the truth:

14,534 new games. In a year. On ONE platform. That is univocally too much. Let’s do some quick math here.

14,534 games. Each game is at the very least a 10-person team and at least a couple years in the making. Let’s say three years.

That’s 145,340 folks working on games since 2020, and who released their game in 2023, right?

Considering how creative industries are all hit-based businesses. 99% of those games will flop. That’s an incredible amount of waste for thousands of people with tunnel vision working hard for years.

Forty years ago, there was a computer game crash. Here’s Wikipedia about it:

The crash was attributed to several factors, including market saturation in the number of video game consoles and available games, many of which were of poor quality. Waning interest in console games in favor of personal computers also played a role. Home video game revenue peaked at around $3.2 billion in 1983, then fell to around $100 million by 1985 (a drop of almost 97 percent).

Looking at all the layoffs last year in companies which are actually making money making games, entertainment competition (streaming and social media) stronger than ever and demographic changes (smaller pool of young players who play one or two games anyway), it’s not hard to see that things are not going to improve anytime soon.

Which means more dependence on whales. Which means more abuse. Oh boy.

Me Myself&I

Tech makes no sense 2024


It’s cold outside. The gateway is supposed to be placed next to a window, the coldest part of any interior. It’s an electronic device that is warm when I touch it. It’s literally called a hotspot.

It’s also working just fine.

Me Myself&I

Park price

“Sixty dollars? I got sixty cents!”

Lil homie at the skate park asking how much a skateboard costs. I’ll try to get him mine next time.

It’s funny how kids say the same stuff at the same age, across different decades, different locations and cultures.

Me Myself&I

Why America has AR-15s

Very simple. Two reasons:

  • To fight nudity. Y’all outside this country might know this, in America nudity is still seen as something dangerous. People need to defend themselves against it. Nudity is everywhere! You need an automatic weapon to survive it.

  • To fight buses and trucks. Americans are dead scared of buses and trucks. They won’t pass them. If they do, they accelerate as if those big machines were going to change their minds, and jump on them for no other reason than being predators! Enters the AR-15. Every car probably has one in the trunk, just to be able to make it home safely through 18-wheelers and bus lanes.

Naked bodies and large vehicles! It’s hostile out there y’all.

Me Myself&I

Me before during and after Saltburn

Me Myself&I

Since wheeeen

Katt has me dying since last night.

I wrote about him before.

Since wheeeeen? tsksksktsktsktsktsktskts

Me Myself&I


Dave’s delivery will always be one of the best. I can listen to that nigga telling stories all day. It’s the flow, the pitch changes, the pauses, the looks. This mf cracks me up.

Not making a raucous noise about LGBTQ jokes but just let the online and offline crowd whisper how not funny those were, would have stabbed him in the heart a thousand times. Instead folks went super loud, all the way to boycotts and physical assault on stage and forgot that a standup comedian is like a boxer: they’re meant for confrontation. That’s their jobs.

So unsurprisingly, Dave went down again with his latest. He will never give a fuck, that’s his job, again.

Incentives shape behaviors. Comedians are here to explore controversy and scandalous things, thoughts and feelings. The incentive is a bit to shock, to make folks uncomfortable in a live, experimental way, yes. That’s standup comedy. So if you shock folks and that it triggers massive publicity and sold out shows, then you do it again.

There’s no need for personal vendetta or anything like this. Just business.

Now of course I really, really, really would love to see Dave explore other fields like, what the fuck is marriage? What’s going on with many men online talking about colored pills? The wild shit that people do while not sober that they would otherwise, not do? How a black Elon Musk would have been doing in Silicon Valley? Not well, bitch! And so many observations that are not being distilled because y’all gave Dave so much attention about jokes that are not so good. Waste.

It’s frustrating sometimes.

Me Myself&I


It’s always the same pattern with women adoptees: adopted, wondering about their past, a husband scoops them up, they have a baby and the story arc ends. “You were alone in your life but now you have re-created a family that is YOURS.” Everyone smiles. It’s adorable. And scene.

It’s a lot different for a black man adoptee. There are logistics issues; I couldn’t just simply become a wife, I’m a boring straight so that doesn’t work. I’ve had to find my place in this world within a system that is quite actively not helping black men (or if it does help, it is bound to be shut down at all costs), and more likely trying to kill us all or make us as impotent as possible.

That’s a pretty big difference!

Childhood trauma or not, difficulty of connecting with people or not, I’ve had to make moves because there was and is just no other way. I’ve had to forget that things are a bit different for me. I never used my energy to make things up about my past. I used it to funnel myself into a sense of normalcy. We here. It’s 100% OK to be here. Grafted or not, it doesn’t really matter. Relationships are built. Literally and figuratively, a big heart is built too. All of that is something you do, not something that is.

My birth family and blood relatives never existed for me and likely never will. It’s fine! It’s easy to have a kid by mistake. Very easy. Birth happened, I was the result. The adults who created me bounced. Some others showed up and said “he’s cute, let’s grow him well” and it went on. There’s no narrative thread, really. That’s something I see a lot: adoptees who become writers because they think a lot about stories. I think a lot about systems. And fixing them.

I’m more design-minded. Systems create stuff. Stuff moves on and creates other stuff and systems. It is endless.

Me Myself&I

Birds of Paradise

I’m surrounded by those where I live. I love that plant so much.

I didn’t know: it is the official flower of Los Angeles! It’s originally from South Africa, but they grow like seaweed in the ocean here in Southern California. They’re everywhere.

The flowers are built different for sure, but I love those fat, wide leaves. They create the best shade and there’s something rich about them, something solid. Give me that luscious vibe, bae.

Tagging Matt for his birthday.