Self Care

October 2nd, 2020 by harold

Good morning,

It’s the 1st of October before 8am and I’m stretching and applying lotion to my body except for that part in the picture. It will be 40°C/104°F today and it will be an OK day. The car will act up a bit, but it will be alright.

The pandemic will still be going. Time will not exist, as usual. The emotional rollercoaster will rival the hardest SixFlags rides, which is expected. It will be a lot of prolonged nose breathing, absolutely essential.

The grind is here. It’s on. Don’t forget to be kind to yourself.

Story time

October 1st, 2020 by harold

Her: Hey Harold Imma need your help.

Me: Sure, with?

Her: The mirror. It needs to be put back on the wall correctly.

Me: Sure does. How do y

Her: I put it up there by myself!

Me: *hehehehehehehehehe* so what do you need me for? You can put it back by yourself, that’s great!

Her: I mean you’re here so no, I don’t have to.


I think that’s amazing how

September 28th, 2020 by harold

Lil miss Flint, a teenager, loves skateboarding and anime.

This weekend someone in his 50s (my man said in a LA Times interview that he’s 37… My bad bro!) went viral riding his skateboarding while drinking juice and singing.

I’m the same and I consume skateboarding and anime too, tf?

I think it’s fabulous how culture kind of stopped moving in the past 40 years. Things just stabilized. Skateboarding, anime, video games or vibin’ to music are just as good, as wholesome, as liberating in 1981 as they are in 2020. Your age doesn’t mean what it used to. You simply enjoy activities, and smile!

It might be the first time in human history that multiple generations embrace the same hobbies on a global scale, for decades on in.

I’m in the middle of that quiet revolution and lovin’ it.

Keep being unbothered, y’all.


September 27th, 2020 by harold

I do a lot of things on my own.

I make my espressos through the day, pressing them by hand.

I make my lunch and dinner and of course the dishes that go with them.

I drive/ride a device myself everywhere.

I clean around and take the trash out. I do my laundry myself.

I fix most stuff myself, from computer to house to car.

I cut my hair and groom everything myself.

I do all my web stuff myself from managing the servers to hacking a div, plugging a PHP function or designing a logo.

I do all my audio stuff myself from performing to recording, mixing to processing to producing the entire thing.

I obviously write my own posts.

I teach myself, pushing myself to do homework and consistent study.

I help others as much as I can.

And then I go the fuck to sleep, what do you mean bro.

The Shareware Scene

September 24th, 2020 by harold

Filfre has been at it again.

Shareware. Just that word triggers many memories.

It also gives us a light on what computing meant way back in the days. Andrew Fluegelman, one of the pioneer of this business model:

“Like Brand and so many others of a similar bent, Fluegelman saw great potential in the personal computer as a force for social liberation.”

It’s hilarious to read in 2020, isn’t it? There was a sense that software and computers could be leveraged to help any individual. The IBM PC did just that to millions. My mom started her accounting business thanks to an accounting software and two big, beige boxes. A woman in a world of men. Social liberation.

Anyway shareware, aka free work with donations which is so widely used now, was not computing for kid-me: the idea felt right, but it ultimately didn’t seem to be working because being dependent on people’s good will seemed extremely unstable? I remember being excited by shareware yet, not getting how you could possibly run a business afloat with it. It was totally going against the obvious.

“My wife said I was “a foolish old man” if I thought even one person would voluntarily send me money for the program. I was more optimistic. I suspected that enough voluntary payments would come to help pay for expansions to my personal-computer hobby – perhaps several hundred dollars. Maybe even a thousand dollars (in my wildest dreams!).”

Jim Button, another shareware pioneer was getting $1000 worth of checks in the mail every day by 1984. His business peaked at $4.5M and 35 employees. Not too shabby for a donation-based business.

Those pioneers were pressured to release their work in big boxes sold for hundreds of dollars yet they didn’t cave. They were doing fine and simply didn’t see any benefit about making more money. I love to see this.

Of course, parasites appeared and destroyed many things about shareware including trust, which is so central to it. By the mid 90s, shareware was quite dangerous if you didn’t know what you were doing.

I’m going through those stories (part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5) and reflecting on them and the digital world we have today. It’s fascinating.

This is how we do it

September 23rd, 2020 by harold

Los Angeles is different. In any other city when a black person dies in the hands of police, there are protests online and offline. Thousands of voices rising. Hundreds of thousands, sometimes.

Dijon Kizzee died shot 15+ times by police after being caught riding his bicycle on the wrong side of the street in late August this year in south LA. He was 29.

Other than my dude Bobby at the basketball court the next morning, I haven’t heard a soul talk about it. Not a text message, not a neighbor, a friend or nothing. We are completely and absolutely numb about black death over here. Some people protested. Probably low double digits in front of tanks and officers in gear.

But then I visit the homepage of the biggest news website in France. Sometimes I do to know what’s up there:

I’m not surprised that it makes the French headlines (which says that the sheriff is being scrutinized, which is not really the case, at all). It’s the right amount of macabre voyeurism. But you have to understand how WILD it feels like to me when we locally don’t even acknowledge this man’s right to live. Same story as Ezell Ford. And many more.

We’re traumatized to no end. We have to survive first. We know the police’s budget is completely obscene and dwarfs anything else. This year, city councils and citizens fought to get that budget shaved and it barely went down. Police departments in LA still have a budget of almost $2 billion. Annually. Yeah. And our libraries are scraping funds to serve communities around. We’re beyond shame. We’re in a police state.

We’re traumatized. As I type this, I’m reading about Breonna Taylor not receiving justice. Despite months of demanding it and millions of messages.

There are no words.

The AC conundrum

September 16th, 2020 by harold

(114°F, not far from the ocean, which is messed up)

Hi so yes, it was pretty hot a couple weeks ago. I did skate in this temperature. For about 20 mn or so. It felt like I had someone holding lighters on high flame near my eyeballs while pushing my board. I know, I’m crazy but also my body is quite well designed to sustain temperatures like this. Still, damn it’s hot.

So people want AC everywhere now. It’s so wrong and here’s how. I’ll use my ex-neighborhood timeline as an example:

1. No one has AC.

2. They start construction of new buildings with AC everywhere. So we go from near zero AC units to literally hundreds.

3. People abuse AC and turn their places into snow huts.

4. Abusing AC means the AC units run at full capacity, which draws a lot of electricity. Remember, hundreds of electric engines are running on roofs 24/7 now.

5. We pay the price: power goes out for hours. Extra noise layer all around. And the worst part: all those electric engines HEAT UP the neighborhood. Coupled with taller buildings which reflect more sun and block winds, not enough vegetation to humidify a bit the air and temperature rises quite significantly (up to 12°C/22°F apparently, which is huge).

6. People are hotter and want even more AC.

Rinse, repeat. It is a negative loop. No one cares, I know. But that’s how our Quality of Life goes down.

Buying an electric car isn’t enough. Roughly 40% of CO2 emissions are due to heating/cooling buildings and their construction.

Solution: we must use passive cooling systems that we know how to do since BC. Low-rise buildings, natural ventilation, windows and trees.

And for the days when we’re gently frying in the 45°C+ vibe, well, we’ll sit under a tree and drink water. We’ll be fine.

Fur and Coffee

September 10th, 2020 by harold

I’m heavy on routines. Animals enjoy them a lot as well. After lunch, I digest cruising the streets. After skating until I’m sweaty, usually 25-30mn, I stop and get my coffee to go sit on the curb to grab some vitamin D in the back (yes, we really can use vitamin D these days).

The cat started to show up between my legs. He uses me as an umbrella while I massage his neck. Then he does barrel rolls on the ground, stretching and getting his belly rubbed. Then he smells my coffee, looks around, chilling. No claws ever felt in my flesh, a first for me.

He runs to meet me there now, meowing and shit.

I used to suck at cats but I do well with this one. It’s just that I often feed him, that’s all.

The neighbor just got a puppy though. O M G. I can’t. He’s hilarious and of course freaking adorable. We made contact today and I might have been laying on the ground to make him come to me to sniff me and wag his tail in excitement. He did. And then he run after the cat, who was looking at me like “bro this year is so, so bizarre”  from the top of the stairs, where the puppy can’t go.

Anyway, fellas? Let’s cuddle tomorrow.

l o v e

September 10th, 2020 by harold

Hey hey hey,

This is true, but this is how it works. Don’t be mad at the systems set by the Universe or whatever.

Robert Glasper, HER, Meshell

September 8th, 2020 by harold

I was trying to see if Meshell had turned her Insta back to public but it’s still private. So I clicked on the only link available on her page. I miss the stuff she shared. Books, artwork, quotes, music. I wish she had a Tumblr or a blog and had had one since forever.

Beautiful music. On repeat, of course.